I am the stupidest person in the world and all the things that my mother and sister have been repeating at me for years about not listening and having to concentrate harder when people are telling you things have come to fruitation. Really and truly.
I got a call from my boyfriend yesterday, and took the call entirely in Japanese. Which was my first mistake. A) because phones aren't the best thing for communication and B) because I can't understand all he says on the best of days. So que this conversation translated:
Him: I've just finished work, I'm gonna come over to yours about ten.
Me: oh ok, why? (this is where it begins)
Him:............leaving Kumamoto tomorrow
Me: *kinda shocked* Oh really?...Why?
Him: I'm going to go study in America.
Me: for how long?
Him: maybe forever.
Me: *really shocked* oh...ok....bye
Him: see you later!
Now, if I'd stopped and been sensible I could have come to several conclusions why this is absurd. Firstly, we made plans for the weekend. Secondly, he went back to school on Tuesday and took a maths exam so why would he bother if he's going abroad? And thirdly, why have I never heard anything about it?
Naturally, none of this occured to me at the time. I immediately went into my friends room next door and burst into tears. Que much debating about why he never told me he was leaving and what a dick he is. And how cruel and how I have to phone him up and question him but not cry etc. So I was just crying and crying for an hour and telling everyone how horrid he was and stuff.
Then I made him a gift and poster saying congratulations etc. because I didn't want to seem mean when he came over. Before I punched his lights out. Oh t3h fUnn3h.
So 10pm or so comes and he gets here. And walks in. He doesn't move to come in so I present him with the poster! Shazam!! And he seems impressed with my handycraft if a little bemused at my bright red face and shakey voice. And also he seems confused that I'm telling him congratulations for studying abroad (I reason this down to it not being a Japanese thing) and he crouches down when I ask him to come in and says "I gotta go".
I interpret this as "I have to go get my plane/my parents are in the car outside" or something So I begin quizzing him in the way that girlfriends do when they are being left behind at an hours notice:
Me: how long have you know?
Him: for ages 0_o
Me: why didn't you say anything?
Him: but...like...I thought you knew
This is when I start interpreting his indifference and confusion at my reaction to pure ass-holed using me for physical games, being like all the cliched assholes in movies like Hugh Grant in Bridget Jones etc. etc. Thus...and I'm not proud...I punched him quite hard on the top of the head and started clawing him in the nicest way possible. He took it fairly well, a kind of fear was in his eyes at this point.
Me: how long for?
Him: Forever.
*WHACK* This is when I punch him on top of the head.
Me: I didn't know
Him: but didn't *my brain hears 'I'* say? I thought you knew
Me: no!
Him: so lets go see him!
Me: what?
Him: my friend, Masa, you know him too?...he's leaving for America tomorrow!
Me: ...
Him: what?
Me: not you?
Him: what?
This is when I am so relieved I collapse into a slobbering heap on his lap, snot and everything. And he possibly gets more confused as I sob out I thought he was leaving. Then he starts laughing and I start laughing and it's all good. All so, so, good. And I'm an idiot and I don't care. And everyone thinks he's dumped me and is an asshole, but I don't care. He's not abandoning me and I *did* know his friend was leaving, but I thought he was leaving in April.
Another reason for me to listen more carefully.
My boyfriend ridicules me greatly. I deserve it.
Him: but why didn't you just ask me on the phone?
Me: Because I didn't want to seem rude
